The Big Bang Theory Season 1

Koothrappali is overwhelmed after his parents arrange a blind date, but he discovers he actually can talk to the opposite sex when he has a few drincs, Grasshopper, that is served by Penny tentatively for her practice of her new job in her restaurant. However, complications set in when his beautiful date is more interested in Sheldon.
（女の子と話ができないのに、両親から見合いをセットしたと告げられ困惑していたラジは、ペニーが作ってくれたグラスホッパー（カクテル）を飲んで、酒を飲めば話ができると気がついた。女の子に会ってみるとシェルダンが割り込んで、ラジよりも興味をひいてしまい混乱に．．．．．。）

[The Apartment]
Sheldon: Damn you, walletnook.com.
Leonard: Problem?
Sheldon: The online description was completely misleading, they said eight slots plus removable ID, to any rational person that would mean room for nine cards, but they don't tell you the removable ID takes up one slot, it's a nightmare.(オン・ラインの記述が完璧に間違ってる。8個の口に加えて取り外し式のIDって書いてあるから、理性のある人なら9枚のカードが入れられるって考えるのに、取り外し式のIDが一つのスロットを使うって書いてないよ、悪夢だ。)
Leonard: Okay, now, do you really need the honorary Justice League of America* membership card?(オーケー、君は本当にアメリカ・ジャスティス・リーグの名誉会員のカードが必要なの？) *DCコミックから刊行されているアメリカン・コミックスのスーパーヒーローたちが一堂に会して結成したオールスター・ヒーロー・チーム
Sheldon: It's been in every wallet I've owned since I was five.(5歳の時からいつも財布の中に入れてたんだ。)
Leonard: Why?
Sheldon: It says keep this on your person at all times. (Knock on door) It's right here under Batman's signature.(いつも身につけておけって書いてある。バットマンのサインのすぐ下にさ。)

(Leonard opens door. Raj and Howard are outside. Raj is holding a laptop which is open. His parents are on the screen)
Raj: And this is Leonard and Sheldon's apartment.
Howard: Guess whose parents just got broadband.(誰の親がブロードバンドを手に入れたと思う？)
Raj: May I present, live from New Delhi, Dr and Mrs V. M. Koothrappali.(ニューデリからのライブでクースラパリ博士夫妻を紹介するよ。)
Leonard: Hi.
Dr Koothrappali: Lift up the camera. I'm looking at his crotch.(カメラを上に向けてくれないか。彼の股間が見えてるよ。)
Raj: Sorry papa.
Dr Koothrappali: Oh, there's much better. Hi.
Leonard: Hi!
Raj: And over here is Sheldon.
Sheldon: Hi.
Raj: He lives with Leonard.
Mrs Koothrappali: Oh, that's nice. Like Haroon and Tanvir*.(あら、いいわね。ハルーンとタンヴィアみたい。) *ラジの両親がインドで知っている、子供を養子に迎えたゲイのカップル。
Raj: No, no, not like Haroun and Tanweer.
Mrs Koothrappali: Such sweet young men, they just adopted the cutest little Punjabi baby.
(カメラを上に向けてくれないか。彼の股間が見えてるよ。) Leonard: Yeah, we're not like Haroun and Tanweer!(そう、僕らはハルーンとタンヴィアみたいじゃない。)
Dr Koothrappali: So are you boys academics like our son?(それであなた達は私の息子と同じように大学の教員なのかい？)
Together: Yes.
Dr Koothrappali: And your parents are comfortable with your limited earning potential?
Together: Not at all.
Raj: Papa, please don't start.
Dr Koothrappali: God, it's just a question, he's so sensitive.
Raj: Okay, that's my life, that's my friends, good to see you, say goodbye.
Together: Bye!
Dr Koothrappali: Wait, wait. Before you go we have good news. Put the computer down and gather your friends.
Raj: What is it papa.
Dr Koothrappali: Friends.
Howard: (as they gather) Is it just me, or does webchatting with your clothes on seem a little pointless.(それって僕だけかな、それとも、君のその服でのウェブ会話は少し不適切に見えないかな？)
Mrs Koothrappali: Rajesh, do you remember Lalita Gupta?(ラジェッシュ、ラリタ・グプタのこと覚えてるかい？)
Raj: The little fat girl that used to kick me in the samosas* and call me untouchable.(太った小さな女の子で、僕のあそこにけりを入れて、汚らわしいって言った子だ。) *インド料理の軽食、ジャガイモとグリーンピースなどのペーストを各種の香辛料で味付けし、小麦粉の薄皮で三角形に包み、さっくりと揚げたもの
Mrs Koothrappali: Yes. Well, now she's a dental student at USC, so we gave her your contact information.(そうよ、彼女は今南カリフォルニア大学の歯学部の学生なの。それで、私たちが彼女にあなたへの連絡先を教えたわ。)
Raj: Why did you do that?
Dr Koothrappali: You're 26 years old Rajesh. We want grandchildren.
Raj: But Papa, I'm not supposed…
Mrs Koothrappali: Lalita's parents approve the match.
Dr Koothrappali: If you decide on a spring wedding, we can avoid monsoon season.(お前が春の結婚を決めたらモンスーンの季節を避けられるんだ。)
Raj: Spring wedding?
Mrs Koothrappali: It's up to you dear, we don't want to meddle.(あなた次第よ。私たちは干渉したくないわ。)
Raj: If you don't want to meddle, then why are you meddling.(干渉したくないなら、どうして干渉するのさ。)
Sheldon: If I may, your parents probably don't consider this meddling, while arranged marriages are no longer the norm, Indian parents continue to have a greater than average involvement in their children's lives.(口はさんでいいかな、君の両親は干渉してるつもりはないのさ。見合い結婚はもはや標準ではないけど、インドの親は子供の人生に通常よりも深くかかわってるんだ。)
Raj: Why are you telling me about my own culture?(なんで君が僕らの習慣のことを僕に言うの？)
Sheldon: You seemed confused.(君が混乱してるみたいだからさ。)
Raj: Sorry, Mommy, Papa, but with all due respect I really can't go through… (お言葉を返して申し訳ないけど、僕は実際無理だよ。)
Mrs Koothrappali: Sorry darling, we have to go. Doogie Howser* is on. Grandma, it's Doogie time! Bye bye.(ごめんなさいダーリン、もう行かなきゃ、ドギー・ハウザーが始ってるわ。おばあちゃん、ドギーの時間よ。じゃ、さよなら。) *アメリカのテレビ・コメディー
Dr Koothrappali: Bye bye.
Raj: I don't believe it.
Howard: Neither do I. Doogie Howser's been off the air for like, twenty years.(僕も信じられない。ドギーハウザーは20年前に終わってるのに。)
Leonard: Actually, I read somewhere that it's one of the most popular programmes in India.(それってインドでは最も人気のある番組だってどこかで読んだよ。)
Sheldon: It might speak to a cultural aspiration to have one's children enter the medical profession.(子供を医学部に入れることが文化的な憧れなんだ。)
Leonard: I bet you're right.
Howard: I bet they love Scrubs*.(きっと彼らはスクラブスが好きなんだ。) *「Scrubs～恋のお騒がせ病棟」は研修医とその指導医たちが、医大付属病院を舞台に繰り広げるハートフル・ヒューマン・コメディー。タイトルのスクラブスは、手術着と、新しいことや経験したことのない物事を表すスラングをかけたもの
Sheldon: What's not to love?(好きに決まってるさ。)
Raj: Excuse me, hello? My parents are trying to marry me off to a total stranger, what am I going to do?(失礼、いいかな。僕の両親は僕を全然知らない子と結婚させようとしてるんだ。どうしよう。)
Sheldon: I suggest you go through with it.
Raj: What?
Sheldon: Romantic love as the basis for marriage has only existed since the nineteenth century. Up until then, arranged marriages were the norm, and it served society quite well.(結婚の基礎として恋愛があるのはたかだか19世紀からで、それまでは見合い結婚が標準だったんだ。そしてそれは社会にうまく機能してたんだ。
Howard: It's the entire premise of Fiddler on the Roof.(それは屋根の上のバイオリン弾きの全体的な前提条件だ。）
Leonard: I'm not a big fan of musicals, but I love that show.(僕はミュージカルの熱烈なファンじゃないけどあれは好きだな。）
Howard: Me too. Of course, it speaks to me culturally.(僕ももちろんそうだ、あれは文化的にいけてるよ。）
Sheldon: Understandable, but there's a universality to that story which transcends ethnicity.(理解できるね、だけどあのストーリーには民族性を超えた普遍性があるよ。）
Howard: Let's not forget it's got some really catchy tunes.(あれには心地よい曲があるってことを忘れちゃいけないね。）
All: (various noises of agreement)
Raj: Okay, I know what I'm going to do.(オーケー、僕が何をすればいいかわかったよ。）
Leonard: What?
Raj: Find new friends.
Howard: So who wants to rent Fiddler?
Sheldon: No need, we have the special edition.
Leonard: Well, maybe we are like Haroun and Tanweer.

[The apartment]
Sheldon: (on phone) This is Dr Sheldon Cooper. Yeah, I need to cancel my membership to the Planetarium. Yeah, well I'm sorry too, but there's just no room for you in my wallet. Yeah, I understand, but it was between you and the Museum of Natural History and, frankly, you don't have dinosaurs. Well I'll miss you too, bye bye. Okay, I know you're texting about me, and I'd really like you to stop.(シェルダン博士です。はい、プラネタリウムの会員権を解約したいのです。すみませんが、あなた方は私の財布に入る余裕がないのです。わかりますけど、それはあなたと自然・歴史博物館の間の問題でしょ、それにあなた方は恐竜を持ってない。私も残念です。さよなら。オーケー、あなたが私についてメールしてるのは知ってます。けれど本当にそれはやめてほしいのです。）
Raj: (entering) Oh dear, I am rightly and truly screwed.(ああ、僕は全く混乱してるよ。）
Leonard: Hey, I thought you were finding new friends.(やあ、君は新しい友達を探してると思ってた。）
Raj: I've got some feelers out. In the meantime, listen to this.(ちょっと探りを入れてみたんだ。ちょっとこれを聞いてみて。）
Lalita: (voice from Raj's phone) Hi Rajesh, this is Lalita Gupta. Your mother gave my mother your phone number to give to me. So I'm calling you, and, ah… call me back. Bye.(はい、ラジェッシュ。ラリタ・グプタよ。あなたのお母さんが、あなたの電話番号を私に伝えるように私のお母さんに教えてくれたの。だから今電話してるんだけど、私に電話してね。さよなら。）
Raj: Can you believe how pushy she is?(信じられる？彼女はなんて押しつけがましいんだ。）
Leonard: So don't call her.
Raj: If I don't call her, I won't hear the end of it from my parents.
Leonard: So call her.
Raj: How can I call her, you know I can't talk to women.
Leonard: I'm done, anybody else?(お手上げだね。だれか何かある？）
Howard: Give me the phone.
Raj: Why?
Howard: Just give it to me. (Dials)
Raj: What are you doing?
Howard: Don't worry, you'll thank me. (In a fake Indian accent) Hello Lalita, Raj Koothrappali. (Raj starts to chase Howard across the room.) Yes it is good to talk to you too. So, what are you wearing. Oh, not important, so, anyhow, when would you like to meet. Friday works for me. And I call you with the time and place, but in the meantime, keep it real babe. (In own voice) You may now thank me.(心配しないで。きっと僕に感謝するよ。(インドなまりで）もしもし、クースラパリです。はい、僕もあなたとお話しできてうれしいです。ところで今何着てるの？いや、それは重要じゃないけど、とこれでいつお会いしますか？金曜日は僕は都合がいいです。場所と時間は僕から電話します。じゃ、また。(地声で）僕に感謝するよ。）
Raj: For what, making me sound like a Simpsons* character?(何のために僕の声をシンプソンのキャラクタみたいにするの？） *ザ・シンプソンズは、アメリカのコメディアニメ番組。アメリカの一般的な中産階級の家庭事情をシンプソン一家に要約し、そのライフスタイルを皮肉ったパロディ。シンプソン一家はホーマー、妻のマージ、息子のバート、娘のリサとマギーの5人で構成されており、架空の町であるスプリングフィールドに住んでいる設定になっている。
Howard: Fine, next time make your own date.
Raj: I didn't want to make this one.
Leonard: Look on the bright side, she might turn out to be a nice, beautiful girl.(いい方に考えれば、彼女がいい子で可愛いかもしれないよ。）
Raj: Great, then we'll get married, I won't be able to talk to her, and we'll spend the rest of our lives in total silence.(素晴らしい、そして僕らは結婚して、僕は彼女と話ができなくて、僕らは残りの人生を無言で過ごすだろうよ。）
Howard: Worked for my parents.
Penny (knocking and entering): (knocking and entering) Hi guys.
Leonard: Oh, hey.
Penny: I need some guinea pigs.(誰か実験台が欲しいんだけど。）
Sheldon: Okay, there's a lab animal supply company in Reseda you could try, but if your research is going to have human applications may I suggest white mice instead, their brain chemistry is far closer to ours.(オーケー、実験用動物の動物を供給する会社がレズダにあるけど、君の実験が人体実験の段階になってるなら、代わりに白ネズミを提案するよ。奴らの脳は僕らに似てるからね。）
Penny: I swear to God, Sheldon, one day I'm going to get the hang of talking to you.(神に誓って言うけど、シェルダン、いつかあなたの話についてけるようにするわ。）
Leonard: His mom's been saying that for years. What's up?(彼のお母さんはずっとそう言ってるよ、で、どうしたの？）
Penny: Well, I finally convinced the restaurant to give me a bar tending shift, so I need to practice making drinks.(レストランが私をバーテンダーにシフトしようとしてるのがわかったので、飲み物を作る練習が必要なの。）
Leonard: Oh, great, well the key to acquiring proficiency in any task is repetition.(いいね、なんにでも熟達するには繰り返しが必要だ。）
Sheldon: With certain obvious exceptions. Suicide, for example.(例外はあるけどね、例えば自殺とか。）
Penny: So Leonard, how about it?
Leonard: Look, Penny, we'd love to help you, but Raj is going through some stuff right now. And besides, he doesn't drink, so… (Raj whispers in his ear) Really? Um, Raj is going through some stuff right now and he'd like to take up drinking.(ペニー、僕ら手伝いたいけど、ラジは今やらなきゃならないことがあるんだ。それと、彼は下戸だし、(ラジがささやく）本当？えーと、ラジは今やらなきゃならないことがあるけど、一杯引っ掛けたいんだって。）

[Penny's apartment]
Penny: Okay, here you go, Leonard, one tequila sunrise.
Leonard: Thank you. This drink is a wonderful example of how liquids with different specific gravities interact in a cylindrical container. Thank you.(ありがとう、この飲み物は違う比重の液体が筒状の容器内で以下に作用するかを示す素晴らしい例だね。ありがとう。）
Penny: Okay, Raj, what'll it be? (ラジ、何にする？)
Leonard: Whatever you recommend.
Penny: Uh, how about a grasshopper. I make a mean grasshopper. Okay? Good. Coming up. Sheldon, what are you going to have?(えーと、グラスホッパーなんかどう？私素敵なグラスホッパーを作るわ。オーケー?待ってて。シェルダン、何飲む？)
Sheldon: I'll have a diet coke.
Penny: Okay, can you please order a cocktail, I need to practice mixing drinks.
Sheldon: Fine. I'll have a virgin cuba libre*.
*The Cuba Libre is a highball made of cola, lime, and white rum, while a veirgin cuba libre is referred to as only cola on ice.
Penny: That's, um, rum and coke without the rum.
Sheldon: Yes,
Penny: So coke.
Sheldon: Yes. And would you make it diet?
Penny: There's a can in the fridge.
Sheldon: A cuba libre traditionally comes in a tall glass with a lime wedge.(キューバ・リブレは伝統的に一切れのライム付きの長いグラスで出されるんだよ。）
Penny: Then swim to Cuba.(じゃ、キューバまで泳いで行けば。）
Sheldon: Bartenders are supposed to have people skills.(バーテンダーは人とうまくやってくはずだけど。）
Penny: Okay, Raj, here you go. Alright, who's next?
Howard: I'd like to try a slippery nipple*.(“すべすべした乳首”ちょうだい。） *An alcoholic cocktail made of a layer of Irish cream atop a layer of sambuca(ニワトコの実で作られ甘草で味付けられたイタリアの酒).


Penny: Okay, you're cut off. Anybody need a refill?
Raj: Where did my life go, Penny? One day I'm a carefree batchelor, and the next I'm married and driving a minivan to peewee cricket matches in suburban New Delhi.(僕の人生はどうなるんだろ？ぺにー。ある日僕は無責任な独身で、次に結婚してミニバンを運転してニューデリー郊外の子供のクリケットの試合に行くんだ。）
Penny: A… are you talking to me?
Raj: Is there another Penny here? I had such plans. I had dreams. I was going to be the Indira Gandhi of particle astro-physics. But with a penis, of course.(もう一人のペニーがいるのかい？僕には計画がある。夢がある。インドの素粒子天体物理のガンジーになるんだ。もちろんチンチンもついてるけどね。）
Leonard: It's amazing.
Raj: Ever since I was a little boy my father wanted me to be a gynaecologist like him. How can I be a gynaecologist, I can barely look a woman in the eye. You know what, I'm not going to let my parents control my future any longer, it's time for a showdown. Somebody give me a computer with a webcam.(僕が小さいころから父さんは僕が彼みたいな婦人科医になることを望んでた。でもどうやったら婦人科医になれるんだ。僕は女性を殆ど直視できないのに。わかるかい、僕の将来はもはや両親の思い通りにならない、対決の時なんだ。誰かウェブカメラ付きのパソコンをくれないか。）
Penny: Okay, sweetie, I think that's the grasshopper talking.
Raj: And it's about to tell my parents that I'm not riding an elephant down the aisle with Lalita Gupta.(そして、もう僕は通りをラチナ・グプタと像に乗って行進したりしないって両親に言わなきゃ。）
Penny: Okay, calm down, no-one can make you get married. Why don't you just meet this girl and, see what happens.(オーケー、おちついて、誰もあなたを結婚させたりしないから。単にその子と会って、何が起こるか見てみたら？）
Raj: Haven't you been listening to me, I cannot talk to women.
Leonard: Um… Raj.
Howard: No, no, let's see how long it takes him.
Penny: Um, Raj, honey, you say you can't talk to women but… you've been talking to me.(ラジ、あなた女の子と話せないって言ったけど私と話してるじゃない。）
Sheldon: And now we'll never know.
Raj: You're right. I… I am talking to you. Hello Penny, how are you?
Penny: I'm fine.
Raj: Okay, now I just need to make sure I have a Lalita before I meet the grasshopper. It's a sweet green miracle.(オーケー、グラスホッパーを飲む前にラリータと会うってことを確認しとく必要がある。それって素敵な緑の奇跡だ。）
Penny: Okay, if you're going to drink on this date just promise me you won't overdo it.(オーケー、もしそのデートの時にそれするんだったら、しすぎないように約束してね。）
Raj: Overdo what? Happiness? Freedom? This warm glow inside of me that promises everything is going to be all hunky donkey?(なにをしすぎるの？幸福？自由？全てがうまくいくって約束する僕の中のこの暖かい光かい？）
Penny: Yeah, that. Uh, why don't you bring her to my restaurant when I'm tending the bar so I can keep an eye on you?(ねー、私が看ててあげるから、デートの時に彼女を私がバーテンやってる店に連れてこない？）
Raj: Okay.
Leonard: Wait a minute, what's the plan here? Let's say he meets her and he likes her and they get married, what's he going to do, stay drunk for the rest of his life?ちょっと待ってこの計画って何？彼が彼女に会って、気にいって結婚したら彼どうするつもり？その後の人生を酔っぱらって過ごすの？）
Howard: Worked for my parents.

[The restaurant]
Raj: I can't believe I'm sitting here next to little Lalita Gupta.
Lalita: Well, you are.
Raj: Little Lalita. That's kind of fun to say. Little Lalita, Little Lalita, Little Lalita, you should try it.
Lalita: No, it's okay.
Raj: You have lost so much weight! That must have been difficult for you because you were so, so fat! Do you remember?
Lalita: Yes, I do.
Raj: Of course you do. Who could forget being that fat?
Lalita: Well, I've been trying.
Raj: So you're a dental student? Hmm, are you aware that dentists have an extremely high suicide rate? Not as high as, say, air traffic controllers, but then there are far more dentists than air traffic controllers, so in pure numbers you're still winning.君、歯学生なんだって？歯科医の自殺率が高いって知ってる？航空管制官ほどの率じゃないけど、でもその数は管制官よりずっと多いから、実数はずっと多いんだよ。）
Lalita: Yay me!
Leonard: (to Penny) You have a drink that'll make him less obnoxious?(ペニーに)彼をもう少しいやな奴じゃなくする飲み物ない？）
Penny: Drinks do not work that way.
Howard: I'd say he was doing fine, look at her, last girl my mom set me up with had a moustache and a vestigial tail.(彼はうまくやってると思うよ。前に僕の母親がセットした子は口髭があって退化したしっぽがあったんだ。）
Sheldon: Sorry I'm late.
Leonard: What happened?
Sheldon: Nothing, I just really didn't want to come. Virgin diet cuba libre please.
Penny: Okay.
Sheldon: In a tall glass, with a lime wedge.
Penny: Oh, I'll wedge it right in there.
Sheldon: So, how's Koothrappali d…. oh my Lord.
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: That's Princess Panchali.
Leonard: I'm pretty sure her name's Lalita.
Sheldon: No, no, Princess Panchali from The Monkey and the Princess.
Howard: Oh, yeah, I tried to watch that online, but they wanted a credit card.
Sheldon: It's a children's story.
Howard: Oh, no it isn't.
Sheldon: When I was a little boy and got sick, which was most of the time, my mother would read it to me. It's about an Indian princess who befriends a monkey, who was mocked by all the other monkeys because he was different. For some reason I related to it quite strongly.(僕が小さい頃病気になった時、それはいつもなんだけど、お母さんが僕に読んでくれたんだ。インドの猿の友達のお姫様の話で、その猿は他の猿と違うからいつもバカにされてるんだ。ある理由があって僕もそれにとても似てたんだ。）
Penny: I know the reason.
Leonard: We all know the reason. Sheldon, what are you getting at?(みんなその理由を知ってるさ。シェルダン何が言いたいの。）
Sheldon: That woman looks exactly like the pictures of Princess Punchali in the book. How often does one see a beloved fictional character come to life?(あの子は本の中のパンチャリ姫の絵にそっくりだ。憧れの架空のキャラクタにそっくりな人に出会えるなんて。）
Howard: Every year at Comic Con. Every day at Disneyland you can hire Snow White to come to your house. Course they prefer it if you have a kid, but…(コミック・コンファレンスに行けば毎年会えるよ。ディズニーランドに行けば毎日白雪姫を自宅で雇えるさ。子供がいれば大喜びだけど･･･。）
Raj: Hey guys. This is Lalita Gupta, Lalita this is Leonard and Sheldon and Howard and Penny. Isn't it great, she isn't fat any more!
Sheldon: Forgive me your highness, for I am but a monkey, and it is in my nature to climb. I did not mean to gaze upon you as you comb your hair.(お許し下さい王女様、私のようなサルにとって登るのは自然なんです。あなたが髪を解かすのを見るつもりではありませんでした。）
Lalita: I'm sorry?
Sheldon: You are the living embodiment of the beautiful Princess Panchali.(あなたは美しいパンチャリ王女の化身です。）
Lalita: Oh, no kidding? Oh, who is that?
Sheldon: A beloved character from an Indian folk tale.(インドの昔話の大好きなキャラクタです。）
Lalita: Oh. Us Indian, or "come to our casino"* Indian?(私たちのようなインド人のこと、それともアメリカ・インディアンのことですか？） *A long time ago, the US government allowed Native Americans to open casinos and make money because of what happened to their land.
Sheldon: You Indian.
Lalita: Oh.
Sheldon: The resemblance is remarkable. I can practically smell the lotus blossoms woven into your ebony hair.(驚くほどそっくりだ。僕は実際にその黒髪に編みこんだ蓮の花の匂いが嗅げるほどだ。)
Lalita: Thanks. I imagine you smell very nice too.
Sheldon: I shower twice a day and wash my hands as often as I can.
Lalita: Really, so do I.
Raj: But you're a dentist, he's nuts.
Lalita: Don't be insulting Rajesh. So, Sheldon, tell me more about this princess you say I look like.(侮辱しないでラジェッシュ。シェルダン、私が似てるっていう王女の話をもっと聴かせて。)
Sheldon: It was said that the Gods fashioned her eyes out of the stars, and that roses were ashamed to bloom in the presence of her ruby lips.(神様が星から彼女の眼を作ったって、バラは彼女のルビーのような唇の前では咲くのを恥じたって言われてるんだ。)
Lalita: Oh my.
Raj: Back off Sheldon.
Sheldon: What?
Raj: If you do not stop hitting on my lady you will feel the full extent of my wrath.(君が僕の彼女に言いよるのをやめないと僕の怒りを買うことになるよ。)
Sheldon: I'm not hitting on her.
Lalita: And I am not your lady.
Howard: And you have no wrath.
Raj: You are my lady. Our parents said so. We are for all intents and purposes one hundred percent hooked up.(君は僕の彼女だ。僕の両親がそう言ったし、僕らみんなの意思と目的によって、結ばれることが確実なんだ。)
Lalita: Okay, let's get something straight here. The only reason I came tonight was to get my parents off my case, I certainly don't need to be getting this old world crap from you.(オーケー、ことをはっきりさせましょ。私がここに来た唯一の訳は両親から自由になるためで、あなたにこの古いくずみたいな結婚をしてもらう必要なんか全然ありません。)
Sheldon: Exactly the kind of spirit with which Princess Panchali led the monkeys to freedom.(まさにパンチャリ王女が猿を自由にしてやった精神のようだ。)
Raj: Oh, screw Princess Panchali.
Lalita: Hey, you can't talk to me like that.
Raj: But you're not Princess Panchali.
Sheldon: Luckily for you, she could have you beheaded.
Lalita: Sheldon, are you hungry?
Sheldon: I could eat.
Lalita: Let's go.
Raj: What just happened?
Leonard: Beats the hell out of me.
Howard: I'll tell you what just happened, I just learned how to pick up Indian chicks.(何が起きたか言ってやろう、僕はインド人の女の子をどうやって釣り上げるか学んだよ。)

[The apartment]
(Raj is talking to his parents on the webcam)
Mrs Koothrappali: What are we supposed to say to Lalita's parents?(ラリタのご両親になんて言えばいいの？)
Dr Koothrappali: I play golf with her father, I won't be able to look at him.(彼女のお父さんとゴルフをするんだけど、彼を観れないよ。)
Raj: Maybe you should keep your eye on the ball, Papa.
Dr Koothrappali: Oh, now you're a funny man? This is not funny, Mr Funny Man.
Leonard: Doctor and Mrs Koothrappali, in all fairness, it wasn't entirely Raj's fault.
Dr Koothrappali: This is a family matter Sheldon.
Leonard: No, I'm Leonard.
Dr Koothrappali: Oh, sorry, you all look alike to us.
Raj: But he's right, Papa, listen to him. (Sheldon enters) You! You are the one who ruined everything!
Mrs Koothrappali: Who is it? We can't see.
Dr Koothrappali: Turn us, turn us.
Raj: Go ahead, tell my parents why they won't have any grandchildren.
Sheldon: How would I know, do you have a low sperm count?(そんなこと知るか、精子の数が足りないのかい？)
Raj: This has nothing to do with my sperm count.
Mrs Koothrappali: You are wearing the boxers that we sent you, aren't you Rajesh.(お前は私たちが送ったボクサーパンツをはいてるかい、ラジェッシュ？)
Raj: Yes Mommy.
Mrs Koothrappali: Because you know what happens to the samosas when you wear the tidy whities.(お前が小さなパンツをはいてたらお前のサモサに何が起こるかわかるかい？)
Raj: Can we please stop talking about my testicles? Sheldon, tell them what you did.(僕の睾丸の話はやめてくれない？シェルダン、君が何をしたか彼らに話してよ。)
Sheldon: What did I do?
Leonard: You left with his date. Friends don't do that to each other.
Sheldon: Oh. Alright, noted. Sorry.
Raj: Sorry? That's all you can say is sorry?
Leonard: Take it, Raj. It's more than I've ever gotten.
Sheldon: And may I point out she wouldn't have asked me to go with her if you hadn't been drunk and boring.(君が酔っぱらって退屈でなかったら、彼女は僕と出かけようなんて言わなかったよ。)
Dr Koothrappali: Drunk?
Sheldon: And boring, her words.
Dr Koothrappali: I knew it, he moves to America and becomes an alcoholic.
Raj: I'm not an alcoholic.
Dr Koothrappali: Then why were you drunk?
Raj: It was just this one time, Papa, I swear.
Dr Koothrappali: Are you in denial? Do we have to come over and do an intervention?(お前は否定するのか？。私たちはそっちに行って仲裁しなきゃならないのかい？)
Mrs Koothrappali: Don't embarrass him in front of his friends.
Dr Koothrappali: Alright. Carry us outside, we want to talk to you in private.
Raj: But Papa, please….
Dr Koothrappali: Now, Rajesh.
Raj: (to Leonard and Sheldon) I have to go.
Dr Koothrappali: Now listen to me….
Raj: Please wait until I get into the hall.
Sheldon: Okay, well, good night.
Leonard: Hold on. What happened with you and Lalita?
Sheldon: We ate. She lectured me on the link between gum disease and heart attacks, nothing I didn't already know, and I came home.(食事して、彼女は歯周病と心臓は麻痺の関係について講義してくれて、僕が知らなかったことはなかったけど、そして家に帰ってきたよ。)
Leonard: So you're not going to see her again?
Sheldon: Why would I see her again? I already have a dentist. (Exits)
Leonard: I wonder who's going to tell his parents they're not having grandchildren.

[Penny's restaurant]
(Sheldon is on the piano, singing "To Life" from Fiddler on the Roof enthusiastically)
Leonard: I don't believe it, what's gotten into him?
Penny: Oh, maybe a couple of virgin cuba libres that turned out to be kind of slutty.(多分、バージン・キューバ・リブレがいかれさせたのよ。)
Leonard: You didn't?(君がやったんじゃないの？)
Penny: Hey, you do your experiments, I do mine.(あなたが実験するみたいに私も実験してみたのよ。)

Story by Dave Goetsch & Steven Molaro
Teleplay by Lee Aronsohn & Robert Cohen
Japanese interpretaion by Norih