The Big Bang Theory Season 1

Leonard volunteers with Sheldon to carry up and sign for a piece of furniture while she is out, hoping to make a good impression on Penny. When they enter Penny's apartment it turns out extremely untidy for Sheldon who is obsessive-compulsive for cleanliness that causes him to break into Penny's apartment in the middle of the night and clean it up. He then gets Leonard in trouble with Penny .... (配達されたペニーの家具を、レナードとシェルダンが階段を押し上げて運びこむと、ペニーの部屋は潔癖症のシェルダンには耐えられない乱雑さ、まるでシリアルのビッグ・ブランをぶちまけたみたい。夜中、ペニーが睡眠中に忍び込んで部屋を掃除をすることに。翌朝、ペニーは気が付き烈火のごとく怒り出し．．．．。)

[Sheldon and Leonard's apartment]
Leonard: There you go, Pad Thai*, no peanuts.(ほらパッタイだ。ピーナッツなしだよ。) *米粉でできたやや太めのビーフンを使用して作るタイの焼きそばのこと。
Howard: But does it have peanut oil? (でもそれピーナッツ・オイル使ってるだろう？)
Leonard: Uh, I'm not sure, everyone keep an eye on Howard in case he starts to swell up. (んー、わからんけどみんながハワードが膨れ上がってこないか見守ってるよ。)
Sheldon: Since it's not bee season, you can have my epinephrine. (まだ蜂のシーズンじゃないから僕のエピネフリン抗アレルギー剤をあげるよ。)
Raj: Are there any chopsticks?
Sheldon: You don't need chopsticks, this is Thai food.
Leonard: Here we go.
Sheldon: Thailand has had the fork since the latter half of the nineteenth century. Interestingly they don't actually put the fork in their mouth, they use it to put the food on a spoon which then goes into their mouth. (タイでは19世紀後半からフォークを使ってきたんだ。おもしろいことに彼らはフォークを口の中に入れないで、食べ物をスプーンの上に置いてから口の中に入れるんだ。)
Leonard: Ask him for a napkin, I dare you. (彼にナプキンもらえば、できるもんなら。)
(a knock on the door.)
Leonard:I'll get it.
Howard: Do I look puffy? I feel puffy. (僕膨らんでないか？膨らんでるみたいに感じるんだ。)
(Leonard opens door to Penny, steps into hallway)
Penny: Hey Leonard.
Leonard: Oh, hi Penny.
Penny: Am I interrupting.
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: (off) You're not swelling, Howard.
Howard: (off) No, no, look at my fingers, they're like Vienna sausages.
Penny: Sounds like you have company.
Leonard: They're not going anywhere. (Closes door, staying in hallway.) So, you're coming home from work. That's great. How was work.
Penny: Well, you know, it's the Cheesecake Factory. People order cheesecake, and I bring it to them.
Leonard: So, you sort of act as a carbohydrate delivery system. (つまり、炭水化物配達システムみたいなことしてるんだね。)
Penny: Yeah, call it whatever you want, I get minimum wage. Yeah, anyways, I was wondering if you could help me out with something, I was….
Leonard: Yes.
Penny: Oh. Okay, great, I'm having some furniture delivered tomorrow, and I may not be here, so…. (apartment door opens, Sheldon, Raj and Howard appear) Oh! Hel…hello!
Howard: (speaks a phrase in Russian).
Penny: I'm sorry?
Howard: Haven't you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian?
Penny: No, I haven't.
Howard: Get used to it.
Penny: Yeah, I probably won't, but… Hey Sheldon.
Sheldon: Hi.
Penny: Hey Raj! (Raj looks uncomfortable) Still not talking to me, huh?
Sheldon: Don't take it personally, it's his pathology, he can't talk to women.(君のせいじゃないよ。女性と話しできないのは彼の病理学的な問題だから。)
Howard: He can't talk to attractive women, or in your case a cheesecake-scented Goddess!(彼は魅力的な女性とは話ができないんだ、君の場合、チーズケーキの香りのする女神とはね。）
Leonard: So, there's gonna be some furniture delivered?(それで、何か家具の配達があるんだって？）
Penny: Yeah, yeah, if it gets here and I'm not here tomorrow could you just sign for it and have them put it in my apartment.(そうそう、もしも明日私がいないときにそれが着いたらサインして私の部屋に入れといてくれる？）
Leonard: Yeah, no problem.
Penny: Great, here's my spare key. Thank you.
Leonard: Penny, wait.
Penny: Yeah?
Leonard: Um, if you don't have any other plans, do you want to join us for Thai food and a Superman movie marathon?(うん、もしも君が他に予定ないなら、僕らのタイ料理とスパーマンのマラソン上映に参加しないか？）
Penny: A marathon? Wow, how many Superman movies are there?(マラソン？ワオ、スパーマン映画はいくつあるの？）
Sheldon: You're kidding, right?
Penny: Yeah, I do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter and Superman swooshes down and catches her, which one was that?(そうね、私ロイス・レインがヘリコプターから落ちて、スーパーマンがシューって飛び降りて彼女を捕まえるやつが好きよ、あれはどれなの？）
Leonard,Sheldon and Howard together: One. (Raj raises one finger).
Sheldon: You realise that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy.(あの場面には科学的な不正確さが充満しているんだ。)
Penny: Yes, I know, men can't fly.(そう、私知ってるわ、人間は飛べないもの。)
Sheldon: Oh no, let's assume that they can. Lois Lane is falling, accelerating at an initial rate of 32 feet per second per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Miss Lane, who is now travelling at approximately 120 miles per hour, hits them, and is immediately sliced into three equal pieces.(ちがうよ、考えてごらん。ロイス・レインが加速度32フィート／秒／秒で落下し始めた。スーパーマンは彼女を助けるために高鉄の腕を差し伸べて舞い降りた。レインは今約時速120マイルで落下している。彼らが衝突したら、彼女は瞬時に3つに等分割されちゃうよ。
Leonard: Unless, Superman matches her speed and decelerates.(スーパーマンが彼女のスピードに合わせて減速しなければね。）
Sheldon: In what space, sir, in what space? She's two feet above the ground. Frankly, if he really loved her, he'd let her hit the pavement. It would be a more merciful death.(どの空間で、どの空間でするんだよ。彼女は地面から2フィート上空なんだぜ。率直に言って、もし彼が彼女を愛してるんだったら、彼は彼女を路面に落とすべきだ、その方が慈悲深い死だよ。）
Leonard: Excuse me, your entire argument is predicated on the assumption that Superman's flight is a feat of strength.(失礼だけど、君の議論はスーパーマンが飛ぶのは力技だという仮説に基づいてるよね。）
Sheldon: Are you listening to yourself, it is well established that Superman's flight is a feat of strength, it is an extension of his ability to leap tall buildings, an ability he derives from Earth's yellow Sun.(自分に聞いてるの？スーパーマンが飛べるのは力技で、高いビルを飛び越える力の拡張で、イエロー・サンから能力を得ているっていうのは定説になっているよ。
Howard: Yeah, and you don't have a problem with that, how does he fly at night.(それについては問題があるよ、どうして夜も飛べるのさ。
Sheldon: Uh, a combination of the moon's solar reflection and the energy storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells.(うー、月からの太陽光の反射とクリプトン人の皮膚の電池によるエネルギー貯蔵の組み合わせだよ。
Penny: I'm just going to go wash up.(私片づけに行くわ。)
Leonard: I have 26 hundred comic books in there, I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells.(僕は2千6百冊のコミックブックを持ってる、クリプトン人の皮膚の電池について参考文献を見つけらることを君に挑戦する。)
Sheldon: Challenge accepted. (Tries door.) We're locked out.(挑戦を受けよう。僕ら閉め出された。)
Raj: Also, the pretty girl left.

[Ground floor hallway of the apartment building]
(Leonard is signing for the delivery)

Leonard: Okay, her apartment's on the fourth floor but the elevator's broken so you're going to have to (delivery man leaves) oh, you're just going to be done, okay, cool, thanks. I guess we'll just bring it up ourselves.(オーケー、彼女の部屋は４階だけどエレベーターは壊れてるから君たちは・・・、オー、君たちはここまでか、オーケー、わかった、ありがとう。僕らが運びあげなきゃなんないかも。)
Sheldon: I hardly think so.
Leonard: Why not?
Sheldon: Well, we don't have a dolly, or lifting belts, or any measurable upper body strength.(僕らは手押し車もリフティング・ベルトも上半身の力強さもないからね。)
Leonard: We don't need strength, we're physicists. We are the intellectual descendents of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the Earth, it's just a matter… (starts to move package) I don't have this… I don't have this I don't have this.(僕らに強さは必要ない、僕らは物理学者だ。ごくらはアルキメデスの知性の継承者だ。 てこの支点とレバーがあれば、 僕は地球だって動かせる、それは単に．．．僕はこれを．．．持てない。)
Sheldon: Archimedes would be so proud.(アルキメデスは誇りに思うだろうね。)
Leonard: Do you have any ideas?
Sheldon: Yes, but they all involve a green lantern and a power ring.
(Leonard and Sheldon are now lowering the package onto the bottom of the stairs)
Leonard: Easy, easy (package falls) Okay! Now we've got an inclined plane. The force required to lift is reduced by the sine of the angle of the stairs, call it thirty degrees, so about half.(楽に、楽に、オーケー！今僕らには傾斜した面がある。持ち上げる力は階段の角度、30度としよう、のサインでもって約半分に減じられる。)
Sheldon: Exactly half.
Leonard: (snarkily) Exactly half. Let's push. Okay, see, it's moving, this is easy, all in the math.
Sheldon: What's your formula for the corner.(曲がり角の式はどうなる？)
Leonard: What? Oh, okay, uh, okay, yeah, no problem, just come up here and help me pull and turn.(何？おー、オーケー、オーケー、大丈夫、ここまで来て、僕が引張って回転するのを助けて。)
(Sheldon heads up the stairs. The package slides back down to the bottom.)
Sheldon: Ah, gravity, thou art* a heartless bitch.(あー、重力よ、汝無慈悲な奴。) *you are

[The package on an upstairs hallway, not their own]
Sheldon: You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of you having sexual congress with this woman?(こんなに努力しても君が彼女とセックスできる確率は全然高くならないってわかってる？)
Leonard: Men do things for women without expecting sex.(男は女のためにセックス無しでも尽くすんだ。)
Sheldon: Yeah, those are men who just had sex.(そう、それはセックスしちゃった奴らだ。)
Leonard: I'm doing this to be a good neighbour. In any case, there's no way it could lower the odds.(僕はよき隣人であるためにこれをしてるんだ。どっちにしたって確率が下がることはないよ。)
(They are nearing the top of the staircase)
Leonard: Almost there, almost there, almost there. (Lets go of package, it starts to slip down)
Sheldon: No we're not, no we're not, no we're not.

[Inside Penny's apartment]
(They are laying the package down on the floor)
Sheldon: Watch your fingers. Watch your fingers. Oh God, my fingers!
Leonard: You okay?
Sheldon: No, it hurt… (looking around) Great Caesar's Ghost*, look at this place! （いや、痛いよ[周囲を見回して]おーなんてことだ、この場所を見てよ！）
*シェークスピアの戯曲「ジュリアス・シーザー」の中で、暗殺者の一人ブルータスの前にシーザーの幽霊が現れる場面を暗喩し、「しまった」「大変だ」「なんだって」などの感嘆詞として用いられる。
Leonard: So Penny's a little messy.
Sheldon: A little messy? The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy, this is chaos. Excuse me, explain to me an organisational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid. I'm just inferring that this is a couch, because the evidence suggests the coffee table's having a tiny garage sale.（ちょっと乱雑？複素数のマンデルブロ集合がちょっと乱雑なら、これは混沌だ。長椅子の上に当然のように平皿がおいてあるのはどういうことか説明してくれ。コーヒーテーブルが小さなガレージセールみたいになってるから、これは長椅子だと思うけど。）
Leonard: Did it ever occur to you that not everyone has the compulsive need to sort, organise and label the entire world around them?（周りを強迫観念的に整理整頓して、ラベル付け迄してる人以外に会ったことないの？）
Sheldon: No.
Leonard: Well they don't. Hard as it may be for you to believe, most people don't sort their breakfast cereal numerically by fibre content.（信じられないかもしれないけど、ほとんどの人は朝食のシリアルを繊維質の含有量別に並べたりしないよ。）
Sheldon: Excuse me, but I think we've both found that helpful at times.（失礼、でもあれが僕らには時々役に立つって分かったじゃない。）
Leonard: Come on, we should go.
Sheldon: Hang on.
Leonard: What are you doing?
Sheldon: Straightening up.
Leonard: Sheldon, this is not your home.
Sheldon: This is not anyone's home, this is a swirling vortex of entropy（これは誰の家でもないよ。エントロピーのぐるぐる渦巻きだ。）.
Leonard: When the transvestite lived here, you didn't care how he kept the place.（女装趣味が住んでいた時はどんなに散らかっていても気にしてなかったじゃないか。）
Sheldon: Because it was immaculate, I mean, you open that man's closet, it was left to right, evening gowns, cocktail dresses, then his police uniforms.(あの時はきちんと片付いたからね、君がクロゼットを開けた時、左から右に夜のガウン、カクテルドレス、警官の制服ってなってた。）
Leonard: What were you doing in his closet?
Sheldon: I helped run some cable for a webcam.
Penny:(entering) Hey guys.
Leonard: Oh, hey Penny, this just arrived, we just brought this up, just now.
Penny: Great. Was it hard getting it up the stairs?
Sheldon: (sucks in breath)
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: No?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: No.
Leonard: Well, we'll get out of your hair.（もう終わったからいくよ。）
Penny: Oh, great, thank you again (she throws her jacket over the back of the sofa).
Sheldon: Penny, I just want you to know that, you don't have to live like this. I'm here for you.
Penny: What's he talking about?
Leonard: It's a joke.
Penny: I don't get it.
Leonard: Yeah, he didn't tell it right.

[Leonard's bedroom]
Leonard: Sheldon?

[The living room]
(Leonard enters carrying a light sabre)
Leonard: Sheldon? Hello?

(Notices front door is open, turns off light sabre.)

[Penny's apartment]
(Penny is sleeping, Sheldon is cleaning. Leonard enters.)
Leonard: Sheldon!
Sheldon: Sssshhhh! Penny's sleeping.
Leonard: Are you insane, you can't just break into a woman's apartment in the middle of the night and clean.(気でも違ったのか。女の子のアパートに深夜に忍び込んで掃除するなんて。）
Sheldon: I had no choice. I couldn't sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom was our living room, and just outside our living room was that hallway, and immediately adjacent to that hallway was… this.(他にやりようだないんだ。僕の寝室のすぐ外は居間で、その外は廊下で、そのすぐ近くにこれがあるんだから。）
Leonard: Do you realise that if Penny wakes up, there is no reasonable explanation as to why we're here?(ペニーが目覚めたときに僕らがここにいる正当な理由なんてないってわかってんのか？）
Sheldon: I just gave you a reasonable explanation.(僕は君に妥当な説明をしたよ。）
Leonard: No, no. You gave me an explanation, it's reasonableness will be determined by a jury of your peers.(ちがう、君は僕に説明したけど、それは妥当性は法廷か君の同僚が決めるのさ。）
Sheldon: Don't be ridiculous. I have no peers.(ばかげたこと言うな、僕には同僚なんていない。）
Leonard: Sheldon, we have to get out of here.

(Penny snores)
Sheldon: You might want to speak in a lower register.(低音でしゃべってくれない？）
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: Evolution has made women sensitive to high pitched noises while they sleep, so that they'll be roused by a crying baby. If you want to avoid waking her, speak in a lower register.(進化の過程で女は寝ている間は赤ん坊の泣き声で起きるように高音に敏感になったんだ。）
Leonard: That's ridiculous. (Penny snores again.)
Sheldon: No, (lowering his voice dramatically,) that's ridiculous.
Leonard :(doing likewise) Fine. I accept your premise, now please let's go.(わかった、君の仮説を受け入れるから、さあ頼むから行こう。）
Sheldon: I am not leaving until I'm done.(片付け終わるまで行かないよ。）
Leonard: O-o-o-oh! (Collapses against wall).
Sheldon: If you have time to lean, you have time to clean.(寄りかかってる暇があったら片付けろよ。）
Leonard: Oh, what the hell.

{Living room, morning]
(Sheldon enters, singing to himself)
Sheldon: Morning.
Leonard: Morning.
Sheldon: I have to say, I slept splendidly. Granted, not long, but just deeply and well.(すごくよく眠れたよ。短かったとして、もとても深くてよい眠りだ。）
Leonard: I'm not surprised. A well known folk cure for insomnia is to break into your neighbour's apartment and clean.(驚かないよ。不眠症の治療には隣のアパートに忍び込んで掃除するのがいいんだ。）
Sheldon: Sarcasm?
Leonard: You think?
Sheldon: Granted, my methods may have been somewhat unorthodox, but I think the end result will be a measurable enhancement of Penny's quality of life.(その通り。僕の方法は普通じゃないかもしれないけど、最終的な結果はペニーの生活にある程度の改善をもたらすだろうよ。）
Leonard: You know what, you've convinced me, maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet.
Sheldon: You don't think that crosses a line?
Leonard: Yes! For God's sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth.
Sheldon: You have a sarcasm sign?
Leonard: No, I do not have a sarcasm sign.
Sheldon: Do you want some cereal. I'm feeling so good today I'm going to choose from the low fibre end of the shelf. Hello, Honey Puffs*. *シリアルの商品名
Penny: (voice off) Son of a Bitch!
Leonard: Penny's up.
Penny: (voice off) You sick, geeky bastards!
Leonard: How did she know it was us?
Sheldon: I may have left a suggested organisational schematic for her bedroom closet.(彼女のクロゼットのために整理用の提案図を残したかも。）
Penny: (voice off) Leonard!
Leonard: God, this is going to be bad.
Sheldon: Goodbye, Honey Puffs, hello Big Bran*.(さよなら、ハニー・パフ。こんちはビッグ・ブラン。） *シリアルの商品名
Penny: (entering) You came into my apartment last night when I was sleeping?(あなたたち昨夜私が寝てる間に私の部屋に入ったでしょ？）
Leonard: Yes, but, only to clean.(ああ、でも掃除するだけのためだよ。）
Sheldon: Really more to organise, you're not actually dirty, per se.(整頓だけじゃすまないけど。君自体はそれほど汚くないよ。）
Penny: Give me back my key.(私のカギを返してちょうだい。）
Leonard: I'm very, very sorry.
Penny: Do you understand how creepy this is.(これがどんなに不気味かあなたたち理解してるの？）
Leonard: Oh, yes, we discussed it at length last night.(そのとおり。僕らはその点については昨夜十分議論したよ。）
Penny: In my apartment, while I was sleeping.(私の部屋に、私が眠ってる間に。）
Sheldon: And snoring. And that's probably just a sinus infection, but it could be sleep apnoea, you might want to see an otolaryngologist. It's a throat doctor.(それにいびきもね。 あれはたぶん副鼻腔感染だな、それに無呼吸症にるかも、君は耳鼻咽喉科医にみてもらた方がいいよ。）
Penny: And what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses?(どんな医者があなたのお尻に食い込んだ靴を外すのよ？）
Sheldon: Depending on the depth, that's either a proctologist or a general surgeon.(食い込んだ深さにもよるけど、肛門科か、一般の外科かな。）
(Leonard holds up a sign reading "Sarcasm")
Sheldon: Oh!
Penny: God!
Leonard: Okay, look, no Penny, I think what you're feeling is perfectly valid, and maybe a little bit later today when you're feeling a little bit less, for lack of a better word, violated, maybe we could talk about this some more.(ペニー、君の怒りはもっともだ。後で怒りが収まったら、侵害以外の言葉はないけど、これについて少し話そう。）
Penny: Stay away from me.
Leonard: Sure, that's another way to go.
Sheldon: Penny, Penny, just to clarify because there will be a discussion when you leave, is your objection solely to our presence in the apartment while you were sleeping, or do you also object to the imposition of a new organisational paradigm. (ペニー、君が行っちゃたら少し議論したいので明らかにしてほしいんだけど、君の怒りは君が寝てる間に部屋に忍び込んだことなの、それとも整理の仕方が不満なの？)
(Penny stares in disbelief, then leaves.)
Sheldon:　Well that was a little non-responsive.(あれじゃわかんないよ。）
Leonard: You are going to march yourself over there right now and apologise. (Sheldon laughs.) What's funny?(君は今すぐあそこに行って謝れよ。何がおかしいんだ？）
Sheldon: That wasn't sarcasm?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Wooh, boy, you are all over the place this morning. (うー、まったく、君は今朝は少しおかしいよ。）
(Knocks on Penny's door.)
Sheldon: I have a masters and two PhD's, I should not have to do this.(僕は修士号と2つの博士号を持ってる、こんなことすべきじゃないんだが。）
Penny: (opening door) What?
Sheldon: I am truly sorry for what happened last night, I take full responsibility. And I hope that it won't colour your opinion of Leonard, who is not only a wonderful guy, but also, I hear, a gentle and thorough lover. (昨夜のことは申し訳なかった。全ては僕の責任だ。だからレナードのことを悪く思わないでくれ。彼は素晴らしいだけでなく、やさしくて濃厚なのが好きだそうだ。）
(Leonard, who is at the door of their apartment, cover his face with his hand in expansion; Penny slams door in Sheldon's face withou saying anything.)
(Sheldon comes back; to Leonard)
Sheldon: I did what I could.(僕は出来るだけのことをしたよ。）

[The stairwell]
(Raj is coming up the stairs, he meets Penny who is going down)
Penny: Hey Raj.
(Raj stands looking uncomfortable.) Penny: Hey, listen, I don't know if you heard about what happened last night with Leonard and Sheldon, but I'm really upset about it, I mean they just, they let themselves into my place, and then they cleaned it, I mean can you even believe that? How weird is that?(ヘイ、いいこと、昨夜レナードとシェルダンが何をしたかについて何て聞いてるか知らないけど、私本当にブチ切れてるのよ、彼らは私の部屋に入り込んで掃除したのよ、それって信じられる？なんて不気味なこと？）
Raj: (internally, while Penny continues to talk) Ooh, she's standing very close to me. Oh my, she does smell good. What is that, vanilla?(おー、彼女すごく近いんだけど。ああ、すごくいい匂いがする。何だろう、バニラかな？）
Penny: You know, where I come from, someone comes into your house at night, you shoot, okay? And you don't shoot to wound. I mean, alright, my sister shot her husband, but it was an accident, they were drunk. What was I saying?(私がどこの出身だと思ってるの。家に忍び込んだら銃で撃っちゃうとこよ。傷つけるために撃つんじゃないの。私の姉は夫を撃っちゃたのよ。だけどあれは事故だったんだから。何言ってんだろ。）
Raj :(internally) She's so chatty. Maybe my parents are right. Maybe I'd be better off with an Indian girl. We'd have the same cultural background, and my wife would sing to my children the same lullabies my mother sang to me.((心の内で)彼女はすごいおしゃべりだ。多分僕の両親は正しい。僕にはインド人の女の子の方が向いてる。僕らは同じ文科的背景を持ってるし、僕の妻は僕の子供たちに母さんが僕に歌ってくれたのと同じ子守唄を歌うんだ。）
Penny: It's obvious that they meant well, but I'm just, I'm having a really rough time, like I said, I broke up with my boyfriend, and it's just freaking me out.(彼らがよ彼と思ってたのは明らかよ、でも私はつらい時だったのよ、つまり、ボーイフレンドと別れたばかりだったし、私は気が動転してたわ。）
Raj: (internally sings an Indian lullaby.)
Penny: I mean, just because most of the men I've known in my life happen to be jerks, doesn't mean I should just assume Leonard and Sheldon are. Right?(つまり、私の人生で出会った男たちはみんなむかつく奴だったけど、レナードとシェルダンがそうとは限らないわ。でしょ？）
Raj: (internally) She asked me a question. I should probably nod. (Does.)
Penny: That's exactly what I thought. Thank you for listening. You're a doll. (She hugs him.)(まさにそう思ったのよ。聞いてくれてありがとう。あなたはいい人ね。）
Raj: (internally) Oh-oh. Turn your pelvis*. (Does.) *骨盤

[Sheldon and Leonard's living room]
(Howard is there, playing on a dance video game.)
Howard: (jumping off game mat) Grab a napkin, homie. You just got served.
Leonard: It's fine. You win.
Howard: What's his problem?
Sheldon: His imaginary girlfriend broke up with him.(彼の心の恋人が彼を振ったんだ。）
Howard: Been there.
Raj: (entering) Hello. Sorry I'm late. But I was in the hallway, chatting up Penny.
Howard: Really? You? Rajesh Koothrapali, spoke to Penny?
Raj: Actually, I was less the chatter than the chattee.
Leonard: What did she say? Is she still mad at me?
Raj: Well, she was upset at first, but, probably because her sister shot somebody. Then there was something about you and… then she hugged me.(彼女は最初は怒り狂ってたけど、多分彼女の姉が誰かを撃ったことで。それから君らのことで何か言って、．．．それから僕を抱きしめたんだ。）
Howard: She hugged you? How did she hug you? (君をを抱きしめた？どうやって？）
(Raj hugs Howard.)
Howard: Is that her perfume I smell?(僕が嗅いだのは彼女の香水か？）
Raj: Intoxicating, isn't it?(うっとりしたんじゃない？）

[The hallway]
(Leonard puts a note under Penny's door. It opens.)
Penny: Hi.
Leonard: Oh.
Penny: What's going on?
Leonard: Um, here's the thing. (Reads from note.) Penny. Just as Oppenheimer came to regret his contributions to the first atomic bomb, so too I regret my participation in what was, at the very least, an error in judgement. The hallmark of the great human experiment is the willingness to recognise one's mistakes. Some mistakes, such as Madame Curie's discovery of Radium turned out to have great scientific potential even though she would later die a slow, painful death from radiation poisoning. Another example, from the field of ebola research….(実は、ペニー。オッペンハイマーが最初の原子爆弾の製造に貢献したのを後悔したように、僕も昨夜のことに参加したことを判断の間違いだったって後悔してるんだ。人類の偉大な実験の証しとは、自身の間違いを進んで認めることだ。キューリー夫人が後に放射線照射のゆっくりした苦痛のない被ばく症で亡くなったにしても、ラジウムの発見が化学的に大きな可能性をもたらしたんだし、別の例で言えばエボラウィルスの研究とか．．．。）
Penny: Leonard.
Leonard: Yeah.
Penny: (hugs him) We're okay.
(Penny kisses him on cheek. Closes door. Leonard looks happy, walks back across hallway and straight into the apartment door.)

[Penny's apartment]
(Sheldon and Leonard are trying to construct furniture)
Leonard: Six two inch dowels.(6ケの2インチあわせくぎ。）
Sheldon: Check.
Leonard: One package, Phillips head screws.(プラスねじ1箱。）
Sheldon: Check.
Penny: Guys, seriously, I grew up on a farm, okay, I rebuilt a tractor engine when I was like twelve, I think I can put together a cheap Swedish media centre.(私は農場で育ったのよ。12歳のときにトラクターのエンジンを組み立てなおしたわ。安いスウェーデン製メディア・センターなんて組み立てられるわよ。）
Leonard: No, please, we insist, it's the least we can do considering.(いや、お願い、僕ら主張するけど、考えるのは僕らが出来る最低限だ。）
Sheldon: Considering what? How great this place looks?
Howard: (across room with Raj) Oh boy, I was afraid of this.
Leonard: What?
Howard: These instructions are a pictographic representation of the least imaginative way to assemble these components. This right here is why Sweden has no space program.(この説明書は本当に部品組み立てのイメージがわかない絵だな。ここんとこなんかスウェーデンは宇宙計画がないゆえんだよ。）
Penny: Well, uh, it looked pretty good in the store.(うー、お店では良く見えたんだけどなあ。）
Leonard: It is an inefficient design, for example Penny has a flat screen TV, which means all the space behind it is wasted.(これなんか非効率な設計だ、例えば、ペニーは平面スクリーンのテレビを持ってるけど、それはその後ろが無駄な空間ってことだよ。）
Sheldon: We could put her stereo back there.(彼女のステレオをその後ろにおけるよ。）
Leonard: And control it how?(どうやって操作するの？）
Sheldon: Run an infra-red repeater, photocell here, emitter here, easy peasy.(赤外線中継器を使えよ、光電管はここで、発信器はここだ、とても簡単だよ。）
Howard: (after Raj whispers in his ear) Good point, how you gonna cool it?
Penny: Hey guys, I got this.
Sheldon: Hang on Penny. How about fans, here and here?
Leonard: Also inefficient, and might be loud.
Howard: How about liquid coolant? Maybe a little aquarium pump here, run some quarter inch PVC…(冷却液はどうする？小さな水槽用ポンプをここにおいて、4分の1インチの塩ビ管で．．．。）
Penny: Guys, this is actually really simple.
Howard: Hold on, honey, men at work. The PVC comes down here, maybe a little corrugated sheet metal as a radiator here.(ちょっと待って、男たちは仕事中なんだから。塩ビ管はここで、襞の付いた金属板を放熱板としてここへ。）
Leonard: Oh, really, show me where we put a drip tray, a sluice and an overflow reservoir?(本当、水滴受けと放水路とオーバーフロー貯槽はどこへ置くの？）
Sheldon: And if water is involved we're going to have to ground the crap out of the thing.(それにもし水が入ったらアース(接地)しなきゃならない。）
Penny: Guys, it's hot in here, I think I'll just take off all my clothes.(みんな、ここ暑いわ、私服を全部脱ぎたいわ。）
Leonard: Oh, I've got it. How about if we replace panels A, B and F and crossbar H with aircraft grade aluminium.(おー、わかったぞ、パネルA、BとFと横木のHを航空機グレードのアルミニウムで置き換えるんだ。）
Sheldon: Right, then the entire thing's one big heat sink.(正解、そして全体を一つの大きなヒートシンクにするんだ。）
Howard: Perfect, Leonard, why don't you and Sheldon go down to the junk yard and pick up about six square metres of scrap aluminium, Raj and I will run down to my lab and get the oxy-acetaline torch.(完璧、レナード、君とシェルダンが廃品置き場に行って6平方メートルのアルミ廃材を拾ってきて、ラジと僕は僕の研究室に行って酸素アセチレン・トーチを持ってくる。）
Leonard: Meet back here in an hour?(1時間後にここで落ち合おうか？）
Howard: Done.
Leonard: Got it. (They all leave).
Penny: Okay, this place does look pretty good.(オーケー、ここはとてもいいとこみたいだわ。）

Story by Chuck Lorre & Bill Prady
Teleplay by Robert Cohen & Dave Goetsch
Japanese interpretaion by Norih